... Thinks Michael Gove Is A Modern-Day Stalin?

I couldn't resist a picture that made Gove like he was attempting to MC.

Michael Gove, the Education Secretary of the UK, is completely out of touch with his most recent proposals for educational reforms, which include 10 hour days and exams for 4 year olds. With crazy ideas even Stalin would laugh at, and pictures such as the one above circling the internet, it seems impossible to take this man seriously.


At 4 years old, I found building sandcastles in the sandpits, and rocking the rocking horse just enough so I didn't fall off, challenging enough. I don't think I would have been able to cope with the prospect of an exam. I wouldn't even understand the rules and etiquette of exams, never mind the questions. Early schooling is the perfect stepping stone for 'big school': it gets children used to a routine and interacting with people outside the family. The most important thing at this age is becoming less dependent on parents and gaining initial social skills, not comparing children on their ability to answer questions which I highly doubt will have any significance other than to make the government look like they're doing something.

Keeping schools open til 6pm is another ludicrous concept. Everyone knows that by 2pm a child's attention is dwindling, being held captive in Maths for an extra 4 hours would drive many, staff and students alike, to suicide. Not only would it be a waste of resources, it would make teaching an even less desirable career than it already is. And where do the teachers' come into this? With strikes happening left right and centre as it is, Gove must be out of his mind to think that the staff are just going to accept that they have to stay another 3 hours every day.

One of Gove's earlier proposals was to introduce Latin as a compulsory subject in state-schools; Latin may be beneficial for those hoping to study Classics, or even some Sciences, at a higher level, but forcing an otherwise pretty useless language down a child's throat is just going to make them resent the education system more than many of them already do. Most of my friends hated studying French for 3 years, but at least that has some relevance in today's culture - how else will you survive Disneyland Paris?! Yes, it would be an interesting subject and help broaden the curriculum, but it still should remain optional.

It's all well and good saying that there shouldn't be a recognisable difference between state and private schools. Of course that would be much more fair for students. But it is just not possible. You can't walk around Eton and just be oblivious to it's student:staff ratio, it's tennis courts, it's stables, it's chapel. Surely if it were possible to lessen the gap, private schools would become extinct within a few years (maybe Beatrice can get a new pony with the money saved?). Who in their right mind would pay an average of £7800 per term if their child could receive the same standard of education for free on the taxpayer?

Not only will these reforms cost the government millions if they are accepted (which, let's be honest, we just don't have), it'll leave the UK a nation of social recluses with no wider skills for the careers market - let's face it, if you're spending 10 hours a day at school cramming for exams, you're not going to have time to make solid relationships or try out new hobbies. It'll be eat sleep school repeat. Far-fetched, unachievable goals are entertaining history students nationally as they learn about Stalin's desperate attempts to claim authority in the USSR, how long will it be til we're studying Gove's fall due to his arrogance and nut-job ideas?